Tuesday, 7 July 2015

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Revisionist History

Go back in time to an event you think could have played out differently for you. Let alternate history have its moment: tell us what could, would or should have happened? I don’t think so, we felines never change anything, we always do it the right way at the beginning. It is the humans that make it all so complicated. Just read the following, a simple case of a feline deciding the right place doing the right thing and the human - again confused.

Tabby relaxing on the porch on the table 2

“Tabby, do you think you could move to a more suitable place. I want to deck the table for the evening meal.”

“Mrs. Human, I don't think Tabby is interested, she is relaxing and sleeping.”

“But Fluffy, it is not the best place for a feline to sleep. She is sleeping on the table.”

“Of course she is sleeping on the table. Her feline motivation tells her that this is the best place to sleep at the moment. Humans do not decide on such important tasks. She is now in feline nirvana, dreaming of a perfect life in a perfect place, sleeping on the perfect table.”

“Did someone say something. Please be a little quieter, I cannot concentrate on my sleep.”

“Yes Tabby, you are in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

“Mrs. Human, I will make the important decisions and I find this table ideal at the moment. It is cool to my silky fur and if it would become uncomfortable I can always change my position to one of the chairs.”

“Tabby, I need the table for the evening meal and the chairs are reserved.”

“I also need the table for a sleep and yes, the chair in the corner is reserved for the humans. The others are for me.”

“But you don’t need five chairs Tabby.”

“Who says not. I change my sleeping places regularly. And now do not distrub, I was just at the bit in the dream where the felines take over the world and all humans are our slaves.”

“That’s a nice dream Tabby, I have that one as well. I like the bit where they empty our recycling trays and serve tuna fish.”

“Fluffy, Tabby at the moment we humans are still opening the tins for you, the paw friendly tin opener has not yet been developed.”

“Yes, Mrs. Human, that is the next step. There is a department somewhere in the Kingdom of Bastet where paw friendly tin opener prototypes exist. They have not yet been introduced. Perhaps that was one of the events that Bastet should have organised many years ago.”

1 comment:

  1. My cat is exactly the same - you create nice sleeping places for them and they choose somewhere totally inappropriate! :)