Wednesday, 9 April 2008

Tuna Fish Wednesday

So, cats I hope you are all satisfied. It's Wednesday and we all know what happens on Wednesday.

Tabby: I just don't think it is very funny to film me when I am eating my tuna fish.
Nera: Well, that's your fault Tabby. You are always sleeping somewhere when the tuna fish tin is opened. If you were first in the queue like me and Fluffy, you wouldn't be filmed. Mrs. Human is not home so early. You happened to be eating your portion later and was the suitable victim for a short film made by Mrs. Human on how a cat eats tuna fish.
Fluffy: Is there some tuna left.
Nera: Stay cool Fluffy. Yes there is some left, but save it for later. You don't want to show those humans that we only think of food now, do you?

Fluffy: But I do only think of food really and sleep of course, and in Summer I think of birds flying around outside.
Tabby: Fluffy, your hobbies are not of interest at the moment. Now where can I have a nice quiet sleep somewhere?
Nera: Go in the bathroom on the carpet as usual.
Tabby: I thought I might try another place. Perhaps in the cupboard - it is so comfortable in between the pullovers - no-one sees me and it is so nice and warm.
Nera: I don't care where you sleep as long as you don't take the cushion on the wardrobe at the end. That's MY place.
Tabby: Well I don't see the name Nera written on that cushion.
Nera: Tabby, do I have to prove that it is MY cushion.
Fluffy: Tabby, let her have her cushion, otherwise she starts moaning and showing off. And who wants to sleep in a cushion that smells of dried up snails and full of long black hair.
Nera: I beg your pardon. I do not moan, I just voice my opinion and my long fur helps to protect me from the cold. I will ignore the bit about the snails.
Tabby: Your opinions always seem to be involved with spitting and launching out with the paw. Shame you don't do that a bit more when Roshti is around.
Fluffy: Yes Nera - you always want to be the boss, but when Roshti appears you are the first one through the cat flap.
Nera: That is not true. It just so happened that when Roshti appeared I was on my way indoors to have a lick and a sleep.
Tabby: A likely story.
Nera: And what about you Tabby. I havn't noticed any brave attempts to thwart the Roshti foe up to now. You are always behind me when I go through the cat flap.
Fluffy: Well I think you are both cowards. I have been outside when Roshti arrives and was ready for a fight, but nothing happened.
Nera: That's probably because you don't see him, but only smell him.
Fluffy: So what does Roshti look like.
Tabby: Well he is big, has enormous teeth, paws like barbed wire and his eyes are piercing and wild.
Nera: Don't forget his back legs. They are twice as long as mine and he can push a rock away with them.
Fluffy: Well, if I remember in my seeing days you only have short legs Nera so all cats have long legs for you. And Tabby, you are smaller than me, so everything is big for you.
Tabby: Fluffy fancy a paw punch on the nose?

Nera: And I will ignore the insult about having short legs. Everyone knows I have a long luxurious velvet fur which almost covers my legs but this gives the impression of something delicate and valuable - I do not have short legs. After all Fluffy, you Selkirk Rex cats look like you have put your paw into an electric socket with all that curly fur, not to mention the crew cut you have.
Tabby: Yes looks like something from Dr. Who.
Fluffy: There is nothing worse than jealous cats. The next time Roschti arrives I won't be around to help. Will probably be sleeping somewhere.
Tabby: Well I am off to sleep and what about you two.
Nera: Think I will have a sleep as well.
Fluffy: Well I am off to the computer. When Mrs. Human is finished I can have a look to see what is happening to Mr. Tiddleywinkles and his adventures.
Nera: A good idea Fluffy. Think I will have a look too. It is getting very exciting now. I am sure the cats will rescue England like we saved Egypt in the olden days. Mr. Tiddleywinkles is such a brave good looking cat. Don't you think so Tabby?
Tabby: Snorrrrrrrrrrr.



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