WordPress Daily Prompt: Freaky Friday

You experience your own Freaky Friday, and switch bodies with someone you love/hate. Tell us what happens.

Photographers, artists, poets: show us CHANGE.

Another Friday, week-end shopping to take care of, otherwise just take it easy. I awoke and discovered an itch behind my ear. No problem I lifted my back right leg, claws protruded, and gave it a scratch.

I did what? Something wrong somewhere. I arose on all four legs and walked over to the mirror. What did I see. I saw a tabby cat that glared back, an enemy in my territory. That was the feline side of my brain, but I am human, so I am looking at my reflection. I am a cat. Is this a new version of the Kafka novel The Metamorphosis, where I awake as a member of the feline race. Will I be shunned, ignored by all, left to die of negligence and starvation? Is this the punishment for something I did wrong?

“Meow Mrs. Human” and I was looking into the eyes of my chief cat Nera. “How does it feel?”

“Nera I do not like jokes, this is not funny. I know I often wondered how it must be as a feline, but just wondered.”

“No problem Mrs. Human. I had a word with Bast, you know our chieftain, and he said that he would grant you our wish for you to become a feline, just for a day.”

“Did someone ask me?”

“Mrs. Humans, we felines do not ask, we command. Tabby, Fluffy and I were pleased to see how you coped with the scratch behind the ear.”

“But now something seems to be moving at my fur roots.”

“Just open your mouth and give it a bite. I wouldn’t worry, it is just a cat’s fur life. Might be something or nothing, but you will not die from it. Probably some sort of microbe. If it is a flea it will jump out, but we do not have fleas. We are clean felines. Now I would suggest having a lick all over, just to keep the fur clean.”

So I began to lick my fur. There were some places I could not reach. The side of my head for example, but Tabby gave me advice.

“Mrs. Human, lick your front paw and then wipe it over your head. No, not like that. You have to begin at the back of your ears and go forward to the mouth.”

“Ah yes, I see, what a great feeling. I feel newly born. I am also hungry.”

“Just sniff your way to the food bowl” said Fluffy “the way I do.”

“I can smell  the food, but the bowl is blurred at the edges. Nearly everything near is blurred, but I can see a bird in the tree on the other side of the garden quite clearly”.

“Mrs. Human we felines are short sighted. That is why you should use your nose as well to find something worth eating. You cannot see anything in front of your nose, only things on the other side of the field” advised Tabby.

“That is why I told you to sniff your way to the food bowl; that is always successfulI” said Fluffy.

“Yuck, what is that? I have a mouth full of something that is tasty, but I have to crunch it. Sort of hard pellets, not even with a soft centre: it seems to go down well, but not exactly my taste. Any tuna fish available?”

Nera laughed.

“Nera that is not funny, where is the tuna fish?”

“Mrs. Human, did you open a tin of tuna fish yesterday for our meal. Did you prepare three bowls for Fluffy, Tabby and myself? No, because for some strange reason it was not Wednesday, whatever Wednesday is and we only have tuna fish once a human week on Wednesday.”

“Where is the tin, I will open a tin for us all. How do you expect me to survive on prefabricated pellets of dehydrated something that has a faint taste of chicken?

“The same as you expect we three felines to survive. It is supposed to be full of vitamins and good for you. That is what you are always telling us in your human life. Now it looks like you will have to eat it yourself. Felines do not open tins, they are paw proof. Just remember that tomorrow.”

I choked half a bowl of food down, gave myself another licked wash and felt tired.

“Where can I sleep Nera?”

“I don’t care Mrs. Human. Do we care Tabby, Fluffy.?

and all three felines looked at me with astonishment on their whiskered faces.

Just find somewhere that appeals, a bed, a chair, even on some grass, turn once or twice in a circle and sink down, but pull your tail in.”

“I have a tail? Of course I have a tail, silly question, forget it.”

I slept, and slept and slept and slept etc. etc. That is an advantage of being a cat, you never suffer from insomnia, although I noticed you still realise what is happening around you when sleeping. I must ask Nera how that works.

Tempo passati, it was Saturday. No Freaky Friday any more. My day of Kafkaesque existence was over. What do I do to celebrate, I open a tin of tuna fish and serve it in four dishes. Four dishes? I only have three felines, so who eats the fourth dish. OK, you guessed. I also did not forget to burn a candle for Bast and tell him to forget the experiment in future. I promised to serve tuna fish twice a week instead of only on Wednesday.

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WordPress Daily Prompt: Everything Changes

Walking down the street, you encounter a folded piece of paper on the sidewalk. You pick it up and read it and immediately, your life has changed. Describe this experience. 

Photographers, artists, poets: show us TRANSFORMATION.

So there I was, minding my own business and suddenly I found an interesting piece of paper on the pavement (we do not have sidewalks in Europe). I would have ignored it, but it was wrapped on a stone with a dried spaghetti string. Not something you find every day. I almost squashed it, were it not for the stone, and it was lying beneath the wall of the remand prison: you know the building in town with the iron bars at the window.

Shall I ignore this message or not? Does someone want to send a message claiming a miscarriage of justice, perhaps an attempt to escape? Broke the spaghetti string, which had become quite hard and brittle and unwrapped the paper and decided to read. The ink was red (or was it blood) and the writing written in a hurried scrawling way, as if there was no time to spare.

“To the finder of this message.

Please call tel. No. 666 6666 immediately. The time is ready. I feel it in my bones. The full moon will rise tonight. My deeds have been misjudged; I can only do what I have to. Tell Nick I will be ready tonight at 11.55, five minutes before midnight. Self burning letter after a minute, drop at once.

Vlad”

So what should I do with this I thought? The problem was soon solved; the paper began to turn brown at the edges immediately. I dropped it as it was aflame, and my fingers were burning: a devious way of calling for help. I could not go to the police for assistance; I no longer had any proof. I decided to call the telephone number on the note. I had not exactly memorised it but somehow the number seemed to suit the message, remembering the film The Omen, one of my favourites, and they were always mentioning the No. 666.

My mobile telephone was ready and I dialled.

“Hello, is that Nick speaking.”

“Who gave you my number?”

“I found a note on the pavement from Vlad at the foot of the walls of the remand prison with instructions to call you. Seems he will be ready at 11.55 tonight.”

“Who are you?”

“Just a passer bye: by the way I nearly got burns from the letter when it burst into flames.”

“Still up to his tricks huh? Ok, meet me at the cemetery, this evening at eight. I will be standing next to the crematorium, the third gravestone on the left.”

And with that he hung up.

So what should I do? If I do not attend this meeting, Vlad and Nick will both be disappointed. I could take the local priest with me for protection, but I do not know the local priest. OK, two pieces of wood will do, bound together like a l for protection and a clove of garlic, sounds like it might be useful. More garlic would have been better, but I used it all on a loaf of garlic bread I prepared to eat with the hamburger. Perhaps a gun with a silver bullet, but I have no silver bullets or a gun.

I made my way to the cemetery with a strange feeling deep inside my stomach. Was I going to meet something from another world, or was it the hamburger I swallowed in a hurry before leaving home. It was not such a dark night, although there were threatening clouds breaking the light from the full moon. Full moon? Am I mad going to a cemetery meeting Nick on a full moon night.

I could see the outlines of the crematorium looming in the distance, throwing threatening shadows on the surroundings and then I saw him. A tall appararition, but he was wearing a cylinder hat. He was swathed in a black cloak.

“Are you Nick?” I asked looking into a pair of red rimmed eyes.

“Yes” he answered in a quivering voice. Then he sneezed. “You need not to be afraid, I have caught a dreadful cold waiting around on this cemetery, the reason for my inflamed eyes.”

“Of course” and we both departed for the remand prison. Nick seemed to be quite excited and I had to run to catch up with him, he was moving so fast, almost seemed to be floating on the air. He even lost his cylinder hat on the way, did I see two horns protruding from his head? No, my wild imagnination or a trick of the light probably.

Eventually we arrived. Nick looked upwards to a window and whistled through his teeth. It was quite a loud whistle, but he did have two large canine teeth which seem to grow quite long. An answering whistle came and a figure appeared behind the bars of the window.

“Jump” said Nick

Vlad answered (I suppose it was Vlad) “The bars are in the way and that guy with you is carry a garlic clove and a wooden cross. No way”

“Don’t be stupid Vlad. What are you a costume bearer at a Halloween party or the real thing. Turn into something, one of those bats and fly through the space between the bars. I will deal with the anti-vampire props.”

“Good idea Nick” and I saw how the figure of a man became a bird and flew through the bars.

“Drop them” Nick said and I did. No good arguing with someone with red eyes.

I am sure you would love to hear what happenedd afterwards. Problem was I fell asleep somehow with this Vlad person standing over me. Nick was keeping watch. When I awoke I found I had two new friends and two holes in my neck. Now I never take walks along the pavement during the day: only at night, and Vlad is always with me. Now and again we meet Nick at the cemetery. We always pay a visit to the local blood bank. Vlad says it is more hygienic. You never know where those necks have been.

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