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Tuesday 10 November 2015

Daily Feline Prompt: Secret Feline Admirers

You return home to discover tuna fish, no card attached. Who is it from — and why did they send it to you?

Tabby

“Mrs. Human, who put those tuna fish tins at the entrance to my apartment?”

“I was organising space to accommodate them. They had a special offer, two for one, so I thought I would save money.”

“Mrs. Human, I do not do special offers. They might be old, over the best before date. There is nothing worse than old tuna fish. It is not like water that improves with age, it might poison me.”

“Tabby the tuna fish is Ok, I checked the date. It was cheaper probably because I could buy a pack of six tins together. The more you buy, the cheaper it is.”

“In that case, organise some more. Perhaps about 36 tins, divided by 6 meaning six packs. Yes that will do.”

“But Tabby I do not have the room for so many tins of tuna fish and I thought you wanted fresh tins, not over the date.”

“Of course I do.”

“But you could never eat so many tins in such a quick time.”

“Just watch me Mrs. Human. It just needs organisation. Instead of feeding tuna fish on Wednesday and Sunday you could open a tin every day. It would soon be eaten.”

“But what about your wonderful healthy vitamin filled pellets.”

“No problem, they would still be fresh in five years. Who knows what chemical preservatives they have inside those pellets. No, tuna fish for me, daily, fresh and naturally a bowl of juice to go with it. I read if you garnish it with a slice of lemon, it is even more appetising.”

“But felines do not like citrus fruit.”

“We don’t have to eat it, but you eat with the whiskers according to Paul Whiskers Bocuse and he knows what he is talking about. He invented the feline boulle baisse with mouse liver.”


2 comments:

  1. All they need to do now is invent the paw-friendly ring-pull can top and Tabby will be happy!!

    ReplyDelete