What are the things you need to do within 30 minutes of waking up to ensure your day gets off on the right foot? What happened the last time you didn’t do one of these things?
“Mrs. Human, you are making too much noise, don’t bother me, I am not ready for this yet.”
“Not ready for what Tabby.”
“Waking up. I have a process to digest before moving. Stop breathing, stop moving and above all disappear Mrs. Human.”
“Tabby you have slept at least 18 hours, it is really time for you to get moving.”
“18 hours? Not enough still have two hours in the programme to go. Leave me alone to my meditations.”
“You meditate?”
“Of course, I have to prepare my feline instincts for the day ahead. How do you expect me to pounce on a bird, chase a mouse or eat my vitamin pellets when I might fall asleep whilst I am doing it. I would be the laughing stock of the neighbouring felines. Some of them cannot wait for me to fall asleep on the job. They would take over my territory in the flick of a whisker.”
“What about you Fluffy? Fluffy, Fluffy? He is still asleep, or can I hear him murmuring.”
“Oh yes, just one tummy tickle more and a leg of chicken. And a scratch behind the ear. Oh this is heaven.”
“Fluffy wake up, you are dreaming. No response.”
“Mrs. Human I am now ready.”
“Hello Tabby, I thought you were sleeping.”
“I don’t sleep.”
“Oh yes, you meditate.”
“Exactly and now I am finished meditating. Time for my early morning territory inspection. I smell the ginger tom from next door Mrs. Human. Couldn’t you scare him away?”
“Definitely not Tabby, it is your territory, not mine.”
“And someone has not yet refreshed the outdoor water supply. It is frozen in the bowl. Change it at once Mrs. Human otherwise I will turn into a Grumpy Cat. Hisses.”
“Of course Tabby to your commend.”
“Morning Mrs. Human, Tabby, that was a good nights rest. I feel refreshed and ready to go. Mrs. Human it smells like Ginger Tom from next door here and the water is still frozen in the bowl.”
“Yes I know Fluffy, Tabby has just told me.”
“Then do something about it. Typical human, no respect for feline wishes.”
“Listen you two, I am not here as the personal servant for two felines. You have both slept for the last 18 hours and it is now time to be awake and attend to your daily routine.”
“She’s right Tabby. Let’s do our daily routine.”
“Have you filled our bowl with tuna fish Mrs. Human?”
“Yes felines, it is ready for your breakfast.”
“Ok Fluffy, do you want to use the cat tray first of all or shall I?”
“Go ahead Tabby, I can wait, but make sure you cover it all nicely with your front paws, otherwise it will smell.”
“Fluffy it does not smell, I will just be marking my territory.”
“Sorry Tabby.”
“No problem, and now I think I will catch up on my sleep. Yawn, I feel so tired.”
“I am with you Tabby. Are you finished in the cat tray, then I will use it and curl up for a cat nap.”
And there we have the daily life of a feline, Sleep, eat, recycling process and sleep, some more sleep, perhaps eat, recycle and eventually have a good nights/days sleep. I think we humans do something wrong.
No comments:
Post a Comment