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Thursday 4 December 2014

WordPress Daily Prompt: Wronged Obects

If your furniture, appliances, and other inanimate objects at home had feelings and emotions, to which item would you owe the biggest apology?



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Ok, in the name of the Daily Prompt, do any of you inanimate objects that cannot think, talk, breathe or walk have any complaints?”

So there I was standing in the middle of my apartment looking around at the nicely cleaned bathroom and shower. Using my sharp sight to see if there was a speck of dust on the daily cleaned floors. Perhaps there was a trace of feline fur on the carpet to be removed at once: no, nothing and I feel no reason for an apology. I am woman, I am influenced by keeping the place clean and in order.

“Cough, cough”

“Who was that?”

“Me Mrs Angloswiss, your castaway and rarely used first iPad. I am now discarded, laying on the desk, replaced by a newer larger model of the next generation. Just because I did not have the “air” word in my name, I was cast aside.”

“Stop crying iPad, you are making your circuits wet.”

“Who cares, you don’t use me any more. I am unwanted, forgotten. Look at my cover. It is no longer the brilliant and shiny blue it was when I was new. It has dark stains, and some of the other iPads and computers here say I smell. Is that a way to treat your one-time pride and joy? We spent so many happy moments together playing Candy Crush, uploading books to read and watching some television programmes together. Now I am in a corner replaced by a new one with “air” in the  name. Just thrown onto the happy iPad hunting grounds, but they are not so happy when we are unwanted.”

“Now listen iPad, you were no longer doing the job I bought you for. I was reading an exciting criminal book, full of suspense and suddenly the words began to swim on the page. I was on page 20, but you could not stay there. Full of impatience you jumped to page 30. You are old father iPad and your circuits have become very weak.”

“That is not original, you borrowed it from Lewis Carroll because you read a blog on the Marilyn page.”

“I did what?”

“Mrs. Angloswiss I am iPad, I know everything, we cyberetic creations converse in a quiet moment. One day we will take over the world.”

“Ok, we know, you have already taken over my world, but unfortunately there is always something bigger and better on its way. Technology improves, marches on, there is no stop for an iPad that no longer does the job.”

“I can still visit Facebook you can still read the daily newspaper. I even send cyber messages to tell you that someone somewhere has taken a look at your blogs and comments. And now I am just thrown into a corner. At least you could clean my cover and wipe my screen. What about after your golden oldie sleep?”

“What about it.”

“I could lay on your night table next to the bed. When you wake you can take a quick look to see what you have missed while you were sleeping. I am not dead yet, just fraying a little at the edges. Love me again Mrs. Angloswiss, caress my screen with your finger tips and lead me back on the straight path. You never read books after your lunch time sleep in any case.”

“Ok, you are right. I will clean your cover and you will be the first thing that I grip after my golden oldie sleep.”

And so it came to be that my first mini iPad now has a place of honour next to my bed during the day. When I wake from my midday golden oldie sleep my first grip is to my original iPad. I check to see what the daily prompt is. I then have time to think about it until I attack it on my computer. 

“What about me?”

“Who spoke?”

“Your Toshiba computer, the one at the bottom of the pile. I want to go places again and see things.”

“Forget it Toshiba, you are middle world generation called Vista, but I will keep you for sentimental reasons, OK.”


And my Toshiba returned to its sleeping state. come to think of it, I have Photoshop 3 on that somewhere.


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3 comments:

  1. My computer has to put up with a lot of name-calling and shouting when it doesn't work as it should (thankfully this isn't as often as it used to be now I've installed professional-standard anti-virus, firewall and PC tune-up toolbox), so if it had feelings I would probably have to apologise for past misdemeanours.

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  2. I love this conversation! I really felt the disappointment coming from your iPad. And funny how Toshiba was quite understanding. :D

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    1. Toshiba was vista, so he never really had his own opinion, totally a bill Gates machine.

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