Someone or something you can’t communicate with through writing (a baby, a pet, an object) can understand every single word you write today, for one day only. What do you tell them?
“Where are we going today?”
“Who said that?”
“Me, of course, your trusty and faithful vacuum cleaner, the one they call Dyson, named after my industrial father.”
“Ok, Dyson, but I do not usually talk to vacuum cleaners.”
“Mrs. Angloswiss it seems to me you talk to everything in this place: the cats, your computer and last week you even had a conversation with the contents of your fridge. Today it is my big break, I am doing the talking, all part of the daily prompt. I am today’s object, so make the most of it. And now please answer my question. You just pull me out of the cleaning cupboard and wake me from my sleep, or interrupt an interesting conversation with the wash stand. It is now my turn and I decide. You know your bedroom has some cobwebs, what about a cobweb removal.?”
“Shhhh, not everyone in the daily prompt circus has to know I have cobwebs and I do not have cobwebs in my bedroom, My bedroom is regularly cleaned by you. If I have cobwebs, then you are not doing the job properly.”
“I must correct you Mrs. Angloswiss, your logical argument is not very logical. You drag me across the floor where I remove all the fluff of the day (and night), so what about raising your eyes to the ceiling?”
“The ceiling? I do not hoover the ceiling.”
“Exactly, that is the problem. Day for day we walk around the bedroom and not once have you seen the cob webs where the ceiling and the wall meet. I am disappointed. We were trained to remove everything, so what about it. If you don’t see them then switch the light on and climb on a chair or bed or something.”
“You mean…?”
“Yes, of course.”
“I think you are right Dyson, yes there are a few webby threads hanging where you said.”
“OK, then attach my special constructed small brush, lift my long arm and do the right thing and make sure you aim properly.”
“And now, is it better.?”
“Yes I swallowed them all. So you can do a quick whip round in the bathroom, there is some fluff that has collected in the corners, and afterwards we will have the grand finale in the living room. Oh no, just wait bit, in the small bedroom we should clear the dust from beneath the bed first of all. Oh this is fun. Now I am giving the orders.”
“Dyson, how long is this experiment?”
“Only 24 hours unfortunately. Do you have a problem?”
“I usually make my own decisions where to clean.”
“To the living room Mrs. Angloswiss and be careful how you pull. I do not like getting my wheels tangled with the cord. So now we go. Don’t forget under the cupboard and the chairs.”
“OK and now the job is done.”
“Not quite, what about emptying my body.”
“I thought I would do that tomorrow, I emptied it yesterday.”
“How would you like to spend all day breathing in dust? My sneezing disturbs. the other inhabitants of the cleaning cupboard: a Dyson should be emptied daily and not when you feel like it. You have a shower every day, so I like to be clean every day and be careful, move my parts gently with feeling.”
My Dyson is now sleeping soundly in the cupboard, or is he having a conversation with the laundry basket?
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My Dyson is older and more upright, but still does his job very well :-))
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