Friday, 6 June 2014

WordPress Daily Prompt: Dream Teacher

You can choose any person from history to teach you any topic you want. Who’s your teacher, and what do they teach you?

New look front garden

I know this photo has nothing to do with a teacher, but this little leopard, or whatever, has been with me all my life. He originated with his twin as a book end and a container on his back for anything you might want to put in. He first came into my life in London. I believe he was a hand-me-down from my grandfather. Two years ago I was in London visiting my father and he told me to take him, so he is now living in Switzerland. After spending some time sitting on a cupboard, I have now put him in the fresh air in the garden and he seems to be quite happy there.

My dream teacher would be the teacher that would put up with my moods and my intelligence. I am sure this person has not yet arrived in my life. Today something happened, which helped to form my decision. I must have a teacher that is useful, can impart knowledge to guide my thoughts on the right track. Someone I can look up to, can trust and know that he will bring me through thick and thin. There are not many that qualify for this, but today it became clear that there is one man that would make the grade, show me what to do, when to do it and how to do it. His name is Mark Zuckerberg, the chieftain of Facebook. If you need help then take the best you can get.

This will definitely surprise most of my fans, but after today’s events, fate has formed my choice. Let us begin at the beginning.

Today was a stress day, I had the week-end shopping and Mr. Swiss and I decided to purchase a new table for our porch complete with chairs. We found the model we needed displayed outside our local supermarket. It was perfect. We were loaded with four bags of shopping and had to go to another department to complete the purchase. I sent Mr. Swiss to the car with the shopping and proceeded to the department. I gave the assistant the receipt to show what I wanted to purchase. She looked into her computer and told me that this model is no longer in the programme. They no longer sell it. My first thought was “big deal” and I asked why they have one outside when they are no longer sold. She said I could buy the one being displayed and I could take it with me. I told her that two golden oldies like me and Mr. Swiss will not be loading a fully sized heavy table into our little car, complete with four chairs. There was silence. I told her to deliver it and she added that deliveries are only made from the main storage, and they no longer have the table in the main storage. I will have to organise transport myself. There was another problem. They only had two chairs and if I wanted more, she would organise them from another store where they had twelve. It then seemed that delivery could not be made next week, but in 3-4 weeks and the whole problem was becoming so complicated I told her what to do with her table and chairs and walked away. This sale was not completed.

This was the foundation for a late lunch. I do not like a late lunch as I like to have a golden oldie sleep around 1.15 a.m. at the latest. I was not a happy bunny. I did not have my normal midday cup of tea and chocolate bits after lunch: I had no time for such luxury. I cleaned my teeth and disappeared into the land of golden oldie dreams. I slept quite well, considering the morning excitement and then heard the telephone. Ok, I had managed one and half hours sleep. It was No. 2 son calling to ask if I had sent him a message on Facebook telling him something about 80,000 dollars which I or he could collect. In my muddled brain I really did not know what was going on, until he spoke the works “Facebook account hacked”. He told me he had reported it and I should get onto my computer to see.

I stumbled out of bed and groped my way to the computer. I plugged it in, sent the signals through its brain and entered the realm of Facebook to be confronted with many messages from contacts all telling me that my account must be hacked and to do this, that and the other. One golden rule I knew was “change your password”. I eventually found the link, did it and everything hopefully returned to normal. I chose such a complicated password that I had to write it down. I was assured by many facebook contacts that I was now on the right path. One thing really amazed me, that someone somewhere in the world wanted to look like me. I had been cloned.

There is a positive side to this whole problem. I received a telephone call from someone I had not had contact with since I was working woman, as she had also got my cloned message. I received an e-mail from an ex-work mate shocked to find that I had opened a new account. I was re-discovered, I became the most popular person in Facebook. My mail box was full of messages. Admittedly I was a little lost in this hypersensitive logi-technical sphere, but it was my first hack. I will now change my acount photo to a portrait of Mark Zuckerberg.

And now you see why I would like Mark Zuckerberg as a teacher. If he was my mentor, my educator, I would not have spent minutes searching through Google and Facebook for the cure to my minced account. He would have been online with advice and help and perhaps taught me how to launch a counter attack, “hack on the rebound”.

The problems of an online golden oldie are many. I hope Mark is reading this. 

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  1. I saw all the fuss on FB. I saw a 'friend invite' from you, so first thing I did was go to my friends list to see if you were still there. You were, so the invite was obviously part of this scam and was deleted immediately.

    Your garden is looking lovely. I really do love those yellow Osteospermums!!

    1. I think the worst of the cloning on FB is the explaining to everyone, but I now hope it has quietened down. I am wondering if I can bring them through Winter, but I do not think they are hardy enough.