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Wednesday 7 August 2013

WordPress Daily Prompt: Never Again

Have you ever gone to a new place or tried a new experience and thought to yourself, “I’m never doing that again!” Tell us about it.

Photographers, artists, poets: show us NEVER.




Where have the boats gone


I could write a never ending list about things I would never do again, being a golden oldie you make experiences in life which tell you do not do it again.

A boat ride is something so inviting. My problem begins when boarding the boat. I am talking about small craft or a yacht: not ocean liners. A boat is a fragile creature; note the noun telling us that it is a living thing. I remember some years ago when Mr. Swiss and I were on holiday in the Bernese Overland in the area surrounding Interlaken. We met a colleague who had a holiday home and boat to go with it.

“Come on my boat” he said. It meant walking across a fragile metal framework where you could see the endless depths of the lake below. This rack actually wobbled when walking across it. Luckily Mr. Swiss caught me just in time before my body had decided to see how cold and deep the waters were. I actually made it to the boat, which seemed to shake to and fro according to how high the waves were. Actually there were no real waves, but me being tall and unbalanced, I felt as if I were on the high seas. Everyone was telling me to look at the wonderful view, the ducks, the birds, but I was just trying to work out how I would return to land safely. I arrived, gripping the arm of Mr. Swiss all of the way, which also brought him into a precare situation. I am now retired, but even now I cannot ride a two wheeled bike and later in years the doctor did discover that I suffer from something called Menière Disease which explains the problem.

My daughter (step) also has a boat on the lake of Zürich. Fantastic: she invited me to spend a carefree sailing day on the yacht or whatever with Mr. Swiss and her husband, lunch included. I had to turn it down due to reasons already explained.

No. 2 on my list is an endoscopy, one of those fantastic newly developed medicinal improvements. You have problems with your digestive system? Let us take a look from the inside out, meaning a camera travels through the internal digestive system taking detailed photos. Actually the photographic part is no problem, almost fun, as you watch on the television screen the details. I have been through this examination now five times. Now and again they find something suspicious and up comes a cutting wire, it is removed and probably sent off to some sort of detailed examination. Before the procedure begins the examining doctor puts you to sleep, you do not even notice it. As the camera is returning you are awake. I remember once I even fell asleep whilst I was watching this fascinating experience. I awoke suddenly and told the doctor I must have fallen asleep again.

“Oh no” he said “we had to put you to sleep again, you were talking too much.”

Of course, this terrific expensive wonder of medical technology does have its disadvantage. The camera must enter a clean sterilised world. This means that the day before this great wonder of technology you do not eat anything and that what has been eaten must be removed. Need I say more? It is unpleasant and you are forced to stay in one small room more or less all day until you have taken the liter of medicine you are given to ensure that the camera enters an empty and sterile environment. I have been through this five times and enough is enough. I know what I look like inside, the doctor knows it, and I am not having this done again.

To continue, I am no longer taking any helicopter trips. Over New York was enough, I was feeling rather barfy to say the least when I returned to New York mainland. I have to take my chief cat Nera to the vet tomorrow for a hair cut, but I will not touch her. I will not lift her out of the carrying cage, or help the vet in any way. Mr. Swiss will put her in the cage. The last time I went for a journey with her I had to go to the doctor for a tetanus injection after she tried to sever my thumb from my hand. In other words hands off Nera.

I will also never write a blog without having a backup on another blogging site or on my computer. Experience showed me once when a blogging site decided to close down (Multiply). Now I am mainly in WordPress and a backup on blogger (you never know).



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1 comment:

  1. I'm sure there are things I've done sometime in the past where I've thought 'never again', but I just cannot think of any off the top of my head.

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