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Friday, 18 September 2009

MULTIPLY Wordsmiths Challenge #3: The Killer

Killing is not easy; you have to think it over very carefully. I remember the assignment I had in Dallas; now that was many years ago. I got away with it; some poor old Joe Doe was accused. I had a good group behind me, who planned it in detail from the beginning. They never showed their faces, but I am sure it was something to do with the government. Anyhow after that job, they told me to leave the country otherwise there would be trouble ahead. That was when I decided a trip over the pond would be a good thing. No death sentence there, not that I was out to be caught, but these days you cannot be sure of anyone or anything.

You have to follow certain rules of course; no-one is the born killer. I remember Flashy Jack, that was what we called him. He always wanted to be the best, but you don’t shoot your victim in a restaurant in front of everyone. He was asking to be caught. I soon got known around town, they told me that the gang down in the East was being pushed out of business by Big Fat Lloyd. So what did I do? That was easy. One evening I walked into the Sneaky Rat, the joint that belonged to Fat Lloyd. I naturally wore a tight pink number, showing all my curves and Fat Lloyd just could not resist that.

“Hi, baby, new around here” was his ideal of starting a conversation.

Generally I would have told him where to get off, but I had a mission

“I sure am” was my answer “do you want to show me the routine?”.

Well he did, and his first night spent with me was his last. They never did find his body, but I know how things work. I just phoned the chief of the East gang, and asked what it was worth to him that Fat Lloyd was no longer breathing. He was over the moon, really thrilled, so I told him to get his cleaners down to Fat Lloyd’s place and remove the evidence. I think the remains were finally feeding the fish in the local river. Concrete feet always did stop anything floating to the surface.

I was in, oh yes, Jimmie, the East gang chief just fell in love with me at first sight. It was just too bad that Jimmie started double crossing me. He spent too much time in the Sneaky Rat, which now belonged to Jimmie, thanks to me, and started trying the goods out. Now either he is my man, or he is not. So, I am sorry to say Jimmie had to go. I decided to do this one all official. I just dropped a note to the police to say he was planning to rob a bullion transport. Jimmie told me just everything. I even put blanks in his gun to make sure he would not hurt anyone; too bad that Jimmie got hurt; the police shot him as he opened fire.

So here I am a widow, just don’t have any luck in life. Although things turned to the best when I told the nice policemen how Jimmy had lied to me all his life after I handed over the details I found in his desk of the gang and the jobs they had pulled together. They even gave me a job in Scotland Yard. I started as a normal secretary, but after sleeping my way through a few bosses, I soon got promoted. One of them even died with a heart attack, something to do with the wrong medicine he took.

Anyhow here I am today, one of the best members of the English secret service. Now I always said, if you have a gift, then you should use it. I often get sent on missions abroad. The next job is in Libya, but that will be a difficult one; have not yet worked out how to do it. Advantage is being a lady; I can hide myself under their robes.

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