Tuesday, 6 November 2007

Reservoir Cats - 13

Tabby: My dad Long Tail Al? I suppose that was why I have the red patch of fur on my tummy.
Big Tom: Yes Tabby, you are now a very important cat lady around here.
Tabby: Wait until I tell the others.
Big Tom: I think I will have to call Nera. Nera can you come here a moment. I have just told Tabby who her father is.
Nera: Well I think it is time that she knew.
Tabby: Nera, you mean you knew the truth all the time.
Nera: Our mother told me before we left to live here together. She thought it would be better for you to grow up in the country.
Tabby: Well I must admit I have had a nice life here, plenty of catnip and fresh mice, but when I went to town last week to spy on Grey, I did feel quite at home there.
Nera: Speaking of the notorious Mr. Grey, has anyone seen him lately.
Big Tom: My guardia gatto sent me a message that he is trying to stir up trouble between the town and the country cats.
Tabby: Then we should do something about it. It’s his fault that this started.
Big Tom: Every family has a black sheep sorry cat and Mr. Grey is mine. I will deal with him myself. He is my son and I must carry the responsibility. I probably spoilt him too much. His mother Kimberley was always going on at me that I shouldn’t give him so much power.
Nera: Kimberley is his mother. She is one of the chief Persian ladies at the farm.
Big Tom: I thought I would bring a bit of class into the family, and now it seems to have gone to Mr. Grey’s head.

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We should now start making preparations for the summit meeting with Long Tail Al and his cronies. Romeo come here. Are we all ready?
Romeo: Gladys just arrived with her husband One Eye Fred and Bobinette is waiting.
Big Tom: Gladys are you feeling ok, look a bit shaky on your feet
Gladys: No, I’m ok, my kittens are getting a bit impatient.
Bobinette: When are they due?
Gladys: Well according to my reckoning not until the end of the week.
One Eye Fred: Gladys I told you you had mixed things up a bit – I meself reckon it could be any day now.
Gladys: If I say its not yet, then it’s not yet. Understand.
One Eye Fred: Yer, you’re the boss – most of the time in any case.
Romeo: Capo we should get going.

Long Tail Al: Slimy are ya ready. We don’t wanna be late for this little party do we now.
Slimy: Ready when you are boss.
Long Tail Al: Gawd ‘elp us Slimy, can’t you ‘ave a lick to freshen up first. Down in town it don’t notice so much, but out in the country parts your scent carries miles. Wonder you ever caught a mouse. I’m sure they smell you coming first of all.
Charlie: Hi Al, I’m ‘ere as well, but I ain’t going along if Slimy don’t ‘ave a wash first.
Slimy: Is this a conspiracy. Ok, ok, just give me a few minutes for a lick.
Long Tail Al: Charlie ‘elp ‘im will ya
Charlie: I ain’t ‘elping ‘im. ‘e must ‘ave at least a weeks dirt in ‘is fur.
Long Tail Al: That is a command, got it.
Charlie: Ok, come wiv me Slimy I got an idea.

Charlie: So ‘ow’s that boss, now he’s smelling nice and sweet ain’t ‘e.
Slimy: Cough, cough, cough -
Long Tail Al: Well ‘es soaking wet, What d’ya do wiv ‘im?
Charlie: Just picked ‘im up with me teeth and threw ‘im in the fountain outside the church. So now ‘e ‘ad to ‘ave a wash didn’t ‘e.
Slimy: That weren’t fair Charlie – your bigger than me.
Charlie: And smell a lot better as well don’t I
Long Tail Al: Will you two stop arguing. We’re going to a peace making session and there ain’t gonna be any peace if we can’t be nice to each other, can there.
Slimy: But we ain’t never been nice with each other.
Long Tail Al: Who took ya in when ya was all alone in the sewers cause yr muvver ‘ad run off wiv a Siamese.
Slimy: Yer, well I suppose you ‘ave looked after me all these years.
Charlie: So can we get going, otherwise I might start getting all sentimental.
Long Tail Al: Oh and Charlie, there’s gonna be a few ladies at this meeting so I expect ya to be on your best behaviour. They’re not the sort of ladies you meet on the roof tops.
Charlie: But mind you there are some nice bits of fur out there in the country.
Long Tail Al: Wot ‘ave I done to deserve such morons as a gang?

Mr. Grey’s thoughts: So they’re all meeting for a peace conference this evening. If I had had my way it would have been a declaration of war. Big Tom’s villa is going to be empty and will have no guards when he is at the conference, so I could sleek in and take it over. I still have some best quality cat nip left from the time I was cheated out of my inheritance from Big Tom. If I can manage to get near to the country cats, without being noticed, on their way to the meeting, I could perhaps entice Tabby away as she is quite fond of cat nip and hold her as hostage in Big Tom’s villa. Then they will have to surrender to my demands. Especially as I now know that she is Long Tail Al’s daughter.

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