Daily Prompt: Comedy of Errors (and a bonus assignment)

Murphy’s Law says, “Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.” Write about a time everything did — fiction encouraged here, too!

Bonus assignment: do you keep a notebook next to your bed? Good. Tomorrow morning, jot down the first thought you have upon waking, whether or not it’s coherent.

“Where are you going with the camera in your hand?”. A justified question: it was evening and I was leaving the apartment with a camera.

“I want to take a few photos.”

“But it is dark.”

I added “in the cellar”.

I did not wait for a further question as I decided I would not really have any answers, and so I proceeded on my way. After completing my photo safari in the cellar I moved to the lift for my return journey. We are on the ground floor. Lifts are interesting, you never know what might be inside when they open.

I pressed the button and heard noises in the distance which clearly showed that the lift was ascending and not descending as someone got there before me. One of those people that lived on the second floor, as we only have three floors and the second is the top floor.

I was still waiting, the red light extinguished itself to show that the lift was no longer in action and I heard the lift stop and people made an exit from the lift. Now was my chance. Just as I wanted to press the button again the lift began to move on its own. I heard it descending and decided to wait. Somewhere between the second floor and the cellar it stopped. I realised someone was leaving the building. It had come to a halt on the ground floor. I could hear voices carrying to the outside of the building and the light extinguished again.

Now was my chance, but just as I wanted to call the lift to the basement it sailed away again. I heard voices greeting those that had passed them on their exit from the building and so I realised I was too slow, the lift had again been snapped away by someone entering the building. I was still standing in the cellar, opposite the lift, and waiting, hoping that Mr. Swiss would not be worried.

In the meanwhile whilst the lift was again rising to the second floor (do we really have so many neighbours on the second floor?) I had a brainwave. If the lift eventually arrives I will take a photo of the door opening, it would be a good shot to use one day for a repeated daily prompt.

Actually I was going to use a photo of the grid for this prompt showing how many empty prompts are still in existence of today’s prompt that originally arrived on 27th February 2013. It is a deserted grid. How many of us have abandoned the daily prompt. I had a quick glance at the prompt I wrote in 2013 and discovered that it was not a successful prompt. I followed the instructions with a comedy of errors (based on the truth actually) and it seemed that two years later there were still only 7 blogger likes on my prompt. I could, of course, tell everyone that “I do not care a rat’s arse” about the likes to quote a fellow blogger, but I will not insult the rats.

And now to return to the lift. It arrived on my floor, the red light was gone and the doors began to open, slowly but surely, It was then that I saw something horrific, astonishing, a shock to my system. A strong smell of perfume mixed with vodka, gin and beer hit me as the heavy metal door slowly slid to the left. I hesitated.

Yes, the lift was empty. I decided to take the stairs before someone snapped it away as I was entering the lift. I no longer trusted this lift.

WordPress Daily Prompt: Elevator

Fiction Writers - You're stuck in an elevator with an intriguing stranger. Write this scene.
Non-fiction Writers - You're stuck in an elevator with a person from your past. Write this scene.
This is a mixture. Mr. Moore did exist, he did speak fluent Russian (with a few other languages) and he went on a trip to Russia with other English business men around 1966. He was my boss.

And the lift stopped. I had to hold on to the bar to steady myself. A power cut, no lights: but wait a minute, they are still glowing, but really glowing, not bright and steady, but sort of hazy.

“Well, that was a bumpy journey, but I have arrived. At last we met again.”

I looked in the direction of the voice and there he stood, Mr Moore, my one time boss when I worked for the maritime section of the government. I thought he must have died many years ago. It must be fifty years since I last saw him.

“Mr. Moore, is it really you, and what are you doing in this lift?”

“Ah, this is a lift. I really wanted a transfer to one of those new-fangled spaceships, just to see what the world looked like from above, but you cannot have everything in death I suppose.”

“I am confused. You are here, but speak as if you were not here.”

“No problem, now and again we get a wish granted to break up the boredom. The boss likes to keep us happy.”

“Who is the boss?”

“That depends on which group you belong to. It belongs to the secret part of the unknown, and not something you really should or want to know. Anyhow, now I am here let’s have a catching up conversation. You already know where I am, but how is life treating you; still in the department of maritime affairs.”

“Oh no, Mr. Moore, I left that many years ago. Started a family and moved over to another country, Switzerland.”

“Now that’s interesting, although not my thing. The boys in the external affairs department dealt with Switzerland. You know, no coast, no sea and so no maritime. My thing was more secret happenings on the high seas. Those countries behind the iron curtain, as we then called it, were getting up to strange business. Most of the time the crews were completely drunk, a wonder they ever found their destination.”

“Yes, now I remember. You were an expert on the Russian language and there was a trip arranged to Moscow.”

“That seems like yesterday to me. There were eight of us on a special mission, had a few contacts in the Russian ministry that were quite happy to tell us a few secrets. I remember one of us never came back. They caught him and he spent a few years in the Lubyanka charged with spionage.”

“Oh yes, they was a big story in the newspapers at the time. We were all so sure he was innocent. They finally released him ten years later and he made quite a fortune with his book “I was a british spy”, they even filmed his story.”

“Yes that was Mortimer. He was quite an adventurer, but very careless. Someone like me was never really noticed: just plain and simple, so I got away with murder – figuratively speaking of course.”

I suppose that was Mr. Moore. He was married with four children, took the daily train to work from his little English village and always seem to be dressed in the same suit, which was quite shiny in certain places. I remembered him well. He was a strange person, always wore horn rimmed glasses, and had thinning hair. He was no superman but I always had a feeling that there was something lurking in the background.

I remembered when the memorable trip to Russia was planned upon invitation of the Russian government. It was in the 1960’s and when the Russians decided to warm up a bit towards the West, although no-one really believed it. All the members of the group had to visit a special shop in the West End to hire their fur lined coats. It was winter in Russia and English businessmen were not prepared for the cold weather.

“Yes, that was quite an adventure. It was a shame we had to return the coats after the journey.”

“I was thinking for myself, and not speaking Mr. Moore.”

“No problem Miss errmmmm, sorry cannot remember your name. There were so many of those tipsters in the department, sworn to secrecy of course. As I was saying, we can all do telepathy where I am. The boss likes it that way.

I have to go now, how lovely to see a face from the old days, although I see quite a few here. The boss now has my spaceship ready for the journey. He thought it would be a good idea to have a talk to someone from the old days.

“Perhaps we might meet again, otherwise see you in a few decades. Will put a good word in for you with the boss.”

And with those final words, Mr. Moore sort of wobbled into thin air. I was not so happy about his last words, they gave me a strange feeling, although I suppose we all meet some kind of boss one day.

The power is on in the lift again, so I will go on my way; funny who you meet these days in a lift.

The Lift

The letter was burning in Jeff's pocket. It was one of those bad moments in his position as personal manager for the company. The company was not doing so well and decisions had to be made. For the younger staff, not so bad. They would find another job, in another company, but Joseph FitzSimmons, no, that just did not have to be. Admittedly he was on the wrong side of sixty, but officially he would be retired in two years, so why not wait? Companies lived from their profits and if money had to be saved, you started with those that could have an early retirement, then the lazy ones and eventually the workers you wanted to get rid of for some time. Joseph was number one on the list, he had to go.

Jeff liked Joseph. He was a good man, a worker, never complained if he had to work more hours, if he had to come in on a Saturday morning - no problem. His wife had died a year ago and he was on his own.

"I think I will wait until I give him the letter", Jeff was not happy about this. Then he was distracted by the telephone.

"Jeff Relf, Machine Tools Incorporated, can I help you."

"Of course you can Jeff, just pack your stuff together and come home, dinner is nearly ready and I have a funny feeling that this evening things are going to happen."

Jeff took a quick look at his watch, it was Jean his wife and she was right, it was time to go home.

"Things might happen, you mean..."

"Yes Jeff, I do, tomorrow we are going to be three in the family most probably. But no hurry, I will just be glad when you are home."

"I'm on my way love" and Jeff quickly cleared his desk and said his goodbyes for the evening. He had a train to catch and certainly did not want to be late. There might be a baby on the way.

He glanced quickly in Joseph's direction and noticed that his desk was already abandoned. He usually caught the same train as Jeff.

"Perhaps I could give him the letter when we part company at the station,  no tomorrow morning would be better."

Jeff left the office and enterered the lift, expecting to see Joseph, but there was no Joseph. "Thank goodness for small mercies" thought Jeff and entered the lift. The door was just closing when it sprang open again. Joseph was out of breath as if he had been running.

"That was lucky" Joseph said "I thought I had missed it already."

"I wondered if you would catch the lift, I thought you had already left" answered Jeff and he pressed the button for the ground floor.

"No, I had some business to finish first of all."

The lift moved and then there was an abrupt halt. Jeff was propelled to the opposite wall and there was a complete silence. No sound of a lift motor. and the lights went out. He could only hear the sound of his own breathing.

"Joseph, are you there?"

"Of course I am Jeff, don't intend going anywhere else at the moment. It seems that we are stuck, no light and no movement."

"Not exactly what I need at the moment. My wife called to say that our baby will probably be on its way this evening and being the first, I really don't need a lift that breaks down."

"No worry Jeff, I am sure things will turn out right. Just don't panic."

"But if I miss the train, then I can be lucky to get home in the next hour."

"Same here Jeff, but you are lucky to have someone waiting for you. I just go home to an empty house since Doris passed on. But I don't want to bother you with my problems, I have had a good life, good job and good colleagues. I am sure that this lift will start moving soon and you will be home in time."

Jeff was surprised how calm Joseph was. No light, everything broken, perhaps the lift might start tumbling down the shaft, and there he was quite cool telling Jeff not to worry.

"You know Jeff, I am sure my days are numbered in the company, I am not getting any younger, and have to make room for the youngsters. Today the new generation has to be dynamic, no time to consider personal problems, just look forward and walk over the bodies of the superfluous employees. I can see how things are going and am glad to go."

"But Joseph, you are are one of the best."

"Thanks Jeff, but we both know that the end comes just when you don't expect it. I think I will be glad when I meet my Doris again. I am sure she will be waiting for me. Sometimes I think I can see her."

The conversation was becoming somewhat weird for Jeff's taste, but then suddenly there was another jolt and he could hear the lift machinery again. The lights went on in the lift. Jeff just wanted to reply to Joseph's words and reassure him when the lift doors opened at the ground floor. He looked to Joseph to wish him a pleasant evenng, but Joseph was no longer there.

"He was quick" thought Jeff "probably in a hurry to get home and so am I."

Jeff left the lift and hurried on his way to the station. He glanced at this watch and saw that he had only a few seconds to get the train. He then found the entrance blocked by police and ambulances.

"I have to catch the train" said Jeff to a policeman.

"No more trains today" was the answer. "There was an accident at the station. The train arriving got derailed and a lot of people have been injured and killed that were waiting for the train to arrive.

"But how will I get home?"

"There are busses waiting as a special service."

Jeff managed to catch a bus and eventually arrived home.

Jean was waiting for him.

"Thank goodness you are ok and that nice Mr. FitzWilliam called me to say I shouldn't worry, you were not in that bad accident. There were a lot of people killed. It was the train you always catch."

"I know Jean, but luckily the lift broke down in the office and I was late. You said Joseph called you."

"Yes, he said not to worry and you would be home about half an hour later than usual. And now Jeff, you can call a taxi, our son has decided to put in an appearance this evening."

So Jeff and Jean were soon on their way to the maternity hospital.

The next morning Jeff arrived at the office and wanted to thank Joseph for phoning his wife and tell him that he was now the proud father of a son.

"Didn't you hear Jeff" said his secretary.

"What?"

"Joseph was killed in the train accident yesterday evening. He was one of the passengers waiting for the train on the platform when it derailed. It is so tragic."