Tuesday, 19 August 2014

WordPress Daily Prompt: Tunnel Vision

You’ve been given the ability to build a magical tunnel that will quickly and secretly connect your home with the location of your choice — anywhere on Earth. Where’s the other end of your tunnel?

Tunnel motorway Biel-Solothurn

I was on my way to the cellar where I have my washing machine and found to my astonishment that the door was open. Then I saw him, the man was here again dressed in the WordPress t-shirt, but this time he looked different. He had one of those protective helmets on his head, the same as builders wear when they have a dangerous job to complete. Of course the helmet had the words “WordPress” written on the front in large orange letters to comply with WordPress grid rules. The man had a drill in his hands and had just completed a hole in the floor. His lovely white t-shirt was covered in dirt and even his face was smudged.

“What are you doing in my washing room?” I asked, after coughing due to the dust that had arisen from the drilling. “You cannot drill a large hole in the floor, what will the neighbours think?”

“Hello Mrs. Angloswiss, I am the tunnel constructor for your daily prompt. You must have seen our new bright idea. You have the ability to build a magical tunnel.”

“Yes I saw it. Of course it would be nice to have a magical tunnel. I could then walk over to my dad in London. We only see each other once a year, but I thought it was a magical tunnel, like a figment of my magical imagination.”

“Oh yes, Mrs. Angloswiss, it is magical, but the wording is “given the ability” and I am your ability. Pleased to meet you, you can call me Wordy.”

“Yes Wordy great, but I don’t think this is going to work. I now have an enormous hole in the washing room floor.”

“No worry, Mrs. Angloswiss, here is the lid.”

Wordy snapped his fingers and a large metal manhole cover was placed over the hole.

“Ok, great Wordy, very imaginative, but how do I remove the cover.”

“Snap your fingers, it’s magical.”

I snapped my fingers and the lid slipped to one side. I saw a ladder reaching into the depth.”

“Ok, the tunnel is finished Mrs. Angloswiss, just go down the ladder and follow the tunnel. There are burning torches fixed to the walls to light the way. When you reach the part that is below the English Channel there is a boat moored at the beginning containing a raincoat to protect you from the water. Just row,  it is only 22 miles and you will arrive in England. Afterwards it is easy going until you reach Dagenham, East of London. Just follow the sign saying “End of WordPress tunnel”, climb the ladder and you will be in your father’s apartment.”

“Great, but electric lighting would be better and how come I have to take a boat. The British and the French managed to build a train tunnel beneath the English Channel and it was waterproof.”

“Mrs. Angloswiss, they had more funds available than WordPress. We spent most of the money on our new great improved system. Just imagine the price of a grid. I would allow perhaps two days for the journey. Take a rucksack with enough provisions and a sleeping bag. You might get a little tired and hungry on the way. Do not forget to wear sturdy comfortable shoes, it will be a long walk incorporating slopes and curves. We could not make a straight walk; there were too many obstacles in the way. ”

“Sorry, I don’t get it. I thought it was a magic tunnel: just a few finger snaps and I am there.”

“Not exactly. The magical part is the idea, the prompt ability of it all. The finger snaps are limited, just for the manhole covers. And do not forget your passport.”

“Passport? I thought this is a tunnel.”

“It is, but international laws have to be observed. The Swiss, French and British only gave us planning permission if they could control the usage of this magical tunnel. You will find there are barriers in the tunnel to separate the various countries. You just have to climb the ladder and there is a control point where your passport will be checked. Rest assured, you will arrive eventually, and it does not cost anything. Have fun.”

He snapped his fingers and disappeared.

So there it is, a magical tunnel to England beginning in my washing room in the cellar. I hope the flames of the lights do not extinguish when I am on my way. Typical WordPress, there is always a catch somewhere along the line tunnel.

Click here for more

1 comment:

  1. Mine would go to New Jersey, in the US. No prizes for guessing why. That said, it would be a very long drive, I hope they put petrol stations in the tunnel at regular intervals!!!