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Saturday 22 December 2012

Daily Prompt: Unpopular

Tell us about a time when you had to choose between two options, and you picked the unpopular choice

Fluffy is not speaking to Nera

Many years ago I had to make a decision. The decision for me was quite clear, but there were two voices raised in objection.

“No Mrs. Human, no deal. My litter sister Tabby and I are quite happy in our home, and we really do not need a third feline. And a tom cat into the bargain. No, no , no” and Nera my big fluffy overweight cat with the long black fur stamped her paw to emphasise the point.

“I also have a few words to say” joined in Tabby. “We have no room for another feline here. There are two made to measure cushions here, mine and Nera’s, so where is this stray wannabe feline to sleep. Tom cats smell, they spray everywhere, know no manners. Where does this intruder originate?”

“OK, felines, now cool down and listen. My friend breeds Selkirk Rex cats and now she has a litter born last week. So sweet and lovable. There are four little kittens, so lovable, and I can have one. A little blue persian with curly fur.”

“Mrs. Human Tabby and I know what a Selkirk Rex is. A fluke of nature, they are not even recognised officially.  Forget the blue persian thing, that means in meow, off white with a few grey hairs. They look like they put their paw in an electric socket by mistake: sort of curls by electric shock. They have no whiskers, meaning they grow and break off, also curly. Normal felines do not have curly whiskers. Wake up Mrs. Human, you are being adopted by a freak.”

“Now Nera, that is not very nice. She is a feline like yourself and Tabby and all cats are alike under the law of Bast. Even you should know that. You are always telling me what a great feline Bast was, moving his tribe into the corn chambers in Egypt and taking over.”

“Selkirk Rex did not exist at the time of the Egyptian corn chambers, I very much doubt if this freak’s grandmother existed. Probably arrived from another planet with big ideas of being something special and planting her offspring in places where it is not necessary.”

“Nera, I happen to know who the grandmother and parents of your new brother were. I even have a photo They were pure Selkirk Rex. They have a birth certificate to prove it.”

“Big deal Mrs. Human, but Nera and I do not need certificates to prove anything. We took over here and you take the orders. I do not remember ordering you to move a third feline into our territory. There are certain borderlines and laws to be obeyed. So where is it going to sleep, where is it going to eat and what about the recycling process. Seems to me a lot of the facts of feline life have been ignored by the so-called intelligent species called humans. And what is this talk of a brother. He is certainly not my brother”. Tabby was not amused.

“An mine neither” added Nera.

“Just to put a few things straight felines, Tabby and Nera, I have already organised a third tailor made sleeping cushion for the new arrival. There is enough food for everyone. The bags of feline pellets are ten kilo heavy and last a month for you both, so a third cat will have no problem. At the beginning, of course, I will buy special food for kittens, but after a year you new brother will be eating the same food as you both.”

“Now that does not sound so bad Mrs. Human. I always loved kitten food. Nice and soft and the flavour, just wonderful. It really melted in your mouth.” At least Tabby was happy.

“Tabby, stay on your four paws. We are no longer kittens, but adults and baby food is not for us. Understood! I, Nera, will no longer stoop to baby food. I am sure it will not be healthy for my wonderful soft silky black shiny fur.”

“Nera, you are a show off, sometimes. I like baby food. Hissssss.”

“Felines cool down, I pay the bills so I decide. Further, one large water bowl will be enough for three felines. I have never seen that you all drink at the same time. As far as the recyling process tray is concerned, that is big enough for three felines. I have also never seen that you all use it at the same time. In Summer it seems to me that the outside is one enormous cat tray for all. You share the great outdoors with the other twelve felines that live in the area.”

“Mrs. Human, I have no intention of sharing my cat tray with a curly haired, rasatafari lookalike cat. “

“Nera, since when do you clean your cat tray. Just a layer of special grit over it with your paws and you walk away and leave the work for me. So that argument is now finished. I really see no problems when you have a baby brother. You can show him all the tricks of the feline trade. And by the way I can hear the door opening, I believe your new colleague is arriving with Mr. Human.

+There he is, say hello to Fluffy, you new feline companion.”

“Meow Fluffy, Hisssssssss, what a stupid name” said Nera

“Meow, Fluffy, Nera is the boss, I am the assistant and you are the apprentice. Is that clear???”

And so it began, the lifelong love-hate relationship between two cats from the same litter (with two different fathers) and a Selkirk Rex. I made my choice but Tabby and Nera could never really make up their minds. I found it a good choice; Nera and Tabby are still thinking about it.

3 comments:

  1. I've always wondered about Fluffy's somewhat different take on feline life to the other two, now it becomes clearer!!

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  2. Where is the photo of little Fluffy then? I have never seen one of them and would love to. Great story. LOL

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  3. Fluffy is the white feline on the left.

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