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Friday 25 January 2013

WordPress Daily Prompt: Dearly Departed

Write your own eulogy



Gladiola on black background


So let's see, I always did have a lean to the black side of life. Remembering my many trips to other towns in other countries, I think it was the cemetries that remained most vivid in my imagination and camera, but I have to start somewhere. When I am gone, I really do not want any stupid comments about she was a wonderful person and we will dearly miss her. Of course they will dearly miss me.

"Are you listening cats?"

"Yes Mrs. Human, but don't beat about the bush. When you are gone, you are gone. That's life or was life. If you are no longer here to feed us, then some other human slave will. You know how they all go soft and sloppy seeing cats wandering with no place to go, no bowl of food to digest, and above all no fresh water. I must say Mrs. Human you were quite good at food supplies. Mr. Human is also well trained. He also looks after our recycling process receptacle,  so I think we can cut that bit out of the speech."

"Well I am glad cats, that it will be a short event. We do not want to keep you too long at the cold graveside, do we?"

"Mrs. Human, have a cremation. It is much cheaper and more hygenic. No body parts laying around afterwards. You know what those dogs are like. No intelligence. They just rebury everything they dig up. You might end up with an arm in the garden, and a leg down in the forest. They are not particular about their bones."

"Felines, I think you are getting a bit to down to earth on this. It is me and my remains we are talking about."

"We have a brilliant idea Mrs. Human. In the olden days when Bast was number one on the planet, and had the best solution. Get mummified Mrs. Human. You might eventually arrive in a museum in the future when they discover your pyramid or whatever.  Of course there is a certain process first of all to be dealt with. When that is finished you will be bound in some sort of fabric. In the days of Bast it was just plain old flax or cotton, but these days there are so many possibilities. You could organise something flame, stain and water reistant. Your remains would still be around after the end of the world. Of course a nice form could be made for your final mummified remains. You could even now organise the artist for the casket. I would go for something in the Salvador Dali line of things. I know you admire his paintings, or Margritte. A mummy container with lots of hanging clocks, or apples hiding a head, that would really be something. That would really present a mystery for future archaeologists to find out who you really were? And do not forget to have a pyramid built."

"Cats, stay calm. I do not intend to present a puzzle for mankind years after my demise. And how did we start this morbid conversation in any case?"

"Something about writing your own Eulogy for a daily prompt."

"I don't think I will bother, a bit too much on the morbid side."

"Yes you are right Mrs. Human. But you must admit the pyramid and the mummy bit is a good idea."

3 comments:

  1. I love the conversations you have with your cats!

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  2. LOL @ your smartass cats Pat. They sure have got you covered. *with anything.* LOL

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